I’ve been writing these articles since I was 42 years old, and now, at 61, I’ve come to recognize a pattern. When a woman starts talking about the idea of having a companion, she is often hinting (women tend to speak in hints) that you should consider her as your next companion.
For most of my life, I’ve only had female friends who were married, had children with the same man, and had never been divorced. I believed these women were devoted to their husbands and families. I also made it a point to know their husbands personally.
Recently, I’ve noticed that some of these female friends, who are now my age, approach me when their husbands fall ill or retire. They begin by promoting the idea that I need a companion, and later, I discover their husbands are either hospitalized or no longer working.
One of these women once cried to me, saying, “How can I travel to Europe to see my family if my husband retires? Does he only think about himself?”
It feels like the underlying sentiment is: “How dare he stop working after 40 years without consulting me,” or, “How dare my provider stop providing for me.”
I know I’m not anyone’s idea of Prince Charming, but I’ve been single for 25 years and have earned enough money to support a wife and a family. This fact alone seems to qualify me in the eyes of some women as a potential provider.
However, I refuse to take on the role of “mom’s boyfriend” or “grandma’s boyfriend.”